Starflower
Libri contra Libido
Can books prevent relationships? The american blogosphere has been discussing that question, since an article in the New York Times declared the topic of relevance to relationships.
The article observes that some people end a relationship as soon as they discover their suitor has a bad taste in literature.
Obviously taste can be a good indicator of compatibility (that goes for literature, as well as film, music, art…) A shared favourite novel can get a relationship off to a good start, and it’s important for an avid reader to find a suitor who also enjoys reading.
But does that really justify the arrogance of declaring readers of certain books unsuiable for a relationship? In the comments, readers describe situations where they have ended a relationship upon discovering, in conversation or by a glimpse of the bookshelf, that their suitor reads Harry Potter, Stephen King or Coelho. Suggestions for books that should be on the relationship-killer list are made, some with solid reasoning (pseudo-intellectual, mysoginistic, sex obsessed), partly supported by nothing more than pure snobism (popular, simple, bland).
The desire for a partner with similar taste and shared passions is entirely understandable. But to end a relationship because your suitor has never heard of Pushkin? These literary snobs are limiting themselves to such an extent, they’ll never find a love that’s up to their standards. Part of a relationship means accepting that your partner isn’t identical to you and that you can always expand the other’s hotizon and learn more about each other’s tastes as you fall in love.
